Bad as it may seem, it could always be worse

Boy! I am having a hard time writing about my feelings these days. This very minute I am feeling full of vim and Ovaltine, but here are a few worries I have had over the last two weeks.

What if:

That canned fruit I just ate is infected with botulism?
I have a large cancerous tumor but don’t know it yet?
Iain’s just been in an accident?
A tree in the backyard is about to crash through the house and squash both my babies while I am unstacking the dishwasher?
Western civilization is on the precipice of self-destruction?
That guy picking cigarette butts out of the trash is holding a sack of quarters and is about to bludgeon me?
Someone just broke in to the house but I couldn’t hear it because I was playing Warren Zevon too loud?
My son has rickets?
My other son has a hearing impairment?
That’s not a double chin, but rather a goiter?
There is a terrorist attack on New York City at the precise moment I am crossing the George Washington Bridge*?
I catch salmonella from wearing my wedding band while preparing raw chicken?
My son catches salmonella because he touched raw chicken when I wasn’t looking?
The reason my wedding band fits funny is because I have the rheumatiz, and soon will have two gnarled lumps for hands and won’t be able to type or knit or sew or pluck my eyebrows?
I were to die, leaving behind only some Sweet Valley High books and a half-finished sweater as my inheritance? What kind of legacy is that to give to my children?
Our house has termites but we only find out when we go to sell and discover that the house has been balancing precariously on a few toothpicks’ worth of foundation?

I have, in more recent days, become a bit more circumspect. Which is good. Anxiety is always battling for space among my brain wrinkles, especially since I became a mother. But sometimes it gets a little out of hand.

*It has since been determined that I will use the Tappan Zee. ** Still, scary.

**More on that later.

October 16, 2007 | Filed Under neuroses

Comments

8 Responses to “Bad as it may seem, it could always be worse”

Dallas Meow on October 17th, 2007 12:05 am

Warren Zevon
do tell
Kelley on October 17th, 2007 4:29 am

Oh that was brilliant! I am so glad I am not the only one that hears an aeroplane over head and wonder what will I do when it smashes in the roof. Or planned her husbands funeral down to what the kids would wear because he was 2 hours late coming home…..

Minds like ours are a terrible thing to waste. Better to blog about our neurosis and give the readers a giggle.

And thanks for the reminder. I need to pluck my eyebrows.
DeeJay on October 17th, 2007 6:50 am

My son got salmonella from a restaurant when he was 10 and lived so that may help you feel a little better.
Cindy on October 17th, 2007 9:16 am

Yikes - I’m right there with you worrying. And I don’t have children. Another thing for me to worry about: the worrying gets worse with kids.
katie on October 17th, 2007 11:05 am

well western civilization is already on the perilous road to self-destruction so that’s one thing to cross off your list. cheer up! should you die as long as you give me the sweet valley high books i’ll take care of a better inheirtance for your boys.
Keely on October 17th, 2007 1:52 pm

Gah! This has set me off on worrying even more than I usually do! :/ I became a worry-wart as soon as I realized how happy I was with my husband (then boyfriend). Like that much happiness was bound to invite disaster. Add a baby to the mix and you get one anxious woman.
Elizabeth on October 17th, 2007 4:26 pm

My personal favorite is the termites eating your house foundation down to toothpicks.

I’ve done my fair-share of worrying. Though, now that the house is sold and the baby is born… these 3 kids and messy apartment are keeping my brain too busy to worry much. But! Don’t worry!! I’ll pick it up again soon.

And don’t worry! Yours will fade
Cheryl on October 18th, 2007 3:01 pm

I have a best friend who worries like you do - I am the opposite and don’t worry enough LOL. So I know that saying don’t worry makes no difference. But don’t worry!